For almost 40 years a disease/condition called sarcoidosis has plagued my life. On a number of occassions it was a near death scenario. Today I simply reflect on just one of the days and how things get messed up.
PRAYER: In this meditation process you are asked to read the Scripture, then take a thought that arises from reading the Scripture and pray about that in the context of your own life.)
Oh Lord as I read the scripture I also contemplate the situation I find myself in today. It is Saturday and I have been convinced it is Sunday! Where is my brain? No wonder I have been confused today. Thank you for your mercy and grace. I will continue this tomorrow. (During this week I had a serious bout with my diabetes. I lost awareness of what day it was and started the prayer on Saturday. )
Oh Lord my thoughts turn to yesterday when a moment of surreality captured me. I was caught in my failure, my inability to be in control, powers so strong they acted as if I was caught in the wind being tossed to and fro. Like the song needing to Catch the Wind not ignoring it but soaring within it’s power. Today is Sunday, Lord may I catch the power as Mark talks of it in the Gospel. The presence of your Spirit in the midst of the storm setting me down into peace, may I now bring that peace, grow that peace letting go of the storm, standing still.
Oh Lord the Psalmist reinvigorates the thought, motivates one to seek and desire peace, in such a way that a path of peacefulness is revealed, indeed claimed for others to follow.
Oh Lord today we are in the Advent season. Our marketing, the children in our lives, the religious world we participate in all will remind us. Give us freedom to be released from the spirit of the day giving freedom to be released UNTO your Spirit! Cause that bubble of joy in our chest to sing of your great love and continued care that like the mother of the tiny lamb we shall know you care enough. It is the story of the Advent, the story of the incarnation of your love the understanding of the story of Jesus.
Oh Lord, the words of Mark help us to grasp the reality understanding all we battle with will come to an end. A hope is embedded in our heart in such a way our words and our actions know a purpose. We are not lost in the confusion of pain in our bodies, the swirling of thoughts in our mind, rather we know in the heart, what matters is your desire to deliver us. Mark ‘s words are not just the words of an optimistic young man, they are the words that nurture, give strength and excite us. Thank You, Amen.
MEDITATION: YOU ARE STILL ON THE TEAM!
I wrote it and started to laugh. (laughing) I am still on the team. I AM STILL ON THE TEAM! But I messed up! How can I still be on the team?
The task ever before me was clear, Monday is a day to consider mental health issues when dealing with living with a long term illness. Tuesday is about building and rebuilding a support team. Wednesday is about nurturing a knowledge and wisdom environment to learn how to live with this disease (SARCOIDOSIS). Thursday is about developing a teachable spirit, being open about learning and working through life. Friday is about reaching out beyond yourself letting others experience how your world is larger than yourself. Saturday is about reflection, about the last week and the week to come.
Something happened. I could not reflect. My mind in wanting to appear under control jumped right into Sunday mode. Meditation, writing. This is something I had spent thousands of hours doing. At the same time it felt like my mind was swimming. It could not grasp what was going on.
My friend drove up. We had agreed to work on doors on Saturday. Why, my mind said would he come on Sunday? This only added to the confusion. I looked at the date on my computer. It said Saturday. My mind instantly said, fix the computer, the settings are wrong.
What happens when the human mind doesn’t understand? Are you then dropped from the team? Are you found useless? This meditation has one task, that is to remind you, YOU ARE STILL ON THE TEAM!
The telephone rang a moment ago. Well actually it was the cell phone. The sounds of the trumpet woke me up. My friend was following the meditation. I had fallen sound asleep. The sound of the cell phone a trumpet woke me letting me know once again that in the midst of the storm I was still on the team. Wake up Carl! The scriptures hold true just as Israel had failed God still included them. Just as the people found themselves in the midst of the storm they found peace. And now we are reminded that just as the storm ravishes our bodies we will not be excluded. I discovered my sugar level had gone out of wack. The pain in my body changed as the doctors wanted me to change treatment. The pain causes sugar to go out of wack. The sugar high causes pain to go out of wack. This will not be an easy fix. But I discovered like Israel of old, whether they messed up because of stupidity or accident the scripture reminds us they/we are still on the team.
If there is a spiritual insight here it is simply God wants us on the team. It is a peaceful place to be. Come join me won’t you?
CONCLUSION: I woke up this morning remembering this hymn: How Great Thou Art https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cc0QVWzCv9k